Off to the Slammer

Everyday at preschool is another adventure. Thursday was especially fun because half the day I spent with the babies in the Nursery where two little ladies thought I was their next best option with Mom gone. Not that they were too terribly happy about option #2, but the way they clung to me anyways still made me smile. We did alot of "Here We Go Libby-Loo" for some reason. I guess I was in a Libby-Loo mood.

In the afternoon, I was back on the playground. And I guess it's a good thing for my shoulder, but I can only put 3 kids on it the tire swing (oops! editing) now, not the 6, or 7 I managed when it was a skinny crowd. Well, they're gonna fly with only 3, lemme tell ya! It'll be way more dangerous!! So, I was goofing around on the balance beam with a couple gals and brought back a favorite game from last year - the Jello Jiggler Monster. You start with 2 or 3 and in minutes have about 12 or 20. It's great. I think the other teachers enjoyed it too. Hey, why not, half the mutants were preoccupied! Basically, I put kids on the beam and tell them what kind of Jello Jiggler they are - usually it goes with whatever color they are wearing, or if I'm really bored, I start making up funny flavors to hear them giggle, which makes them fall off, which is the whole point of the game. If they jiggle off the balance beam, then I get to chase them and tickle 'em while making alot of munching noises. I got a good workout chasing kids all over. One little guy on our third lap around the playground, with about 10' between us as we were running, yelled "Please STOP!" What he said and how he said it made it so funny.

So we're chasing and having fun, and here comes a little short squirt who's been dressing up as a police officer all week. He comes up to me, shoots me and then arrests me. Up go my hands, even though I'm pretty sure I'm dead. He tells me "You're under arrest!" So I play along, because seriously, that's the best part of my job; this is where all the real fun happens. I go for the Innocent Look, "Hey! I didn't do nothin! Why are you arresting me?!" and he grabs my arms and pretends to cuffs me. Sound effects and all. I loved it! And as he is leading me to the car on the playground he says "You're a monster, and you chased kids, and you're going to the slammer!". He puts me in the car, just like real police do on TV - I tell ya, I was really impressed. I kept my hands behind my back the whole time just to see how he handled it. It was great! About a dozen kids came to accompany me to jail, taunting and shouting at me that I was going to jail forever. I complained loudly about police brutality. The other teachers were no help; I do believe I saw a camera come out and photos taken! Geez! Then I was taken one leg at a time out of the car, led by my cuffed arms to Lillie's Playhouse aka The Jail. I was thrown in the slammer, surrounded by bloodthirsty little demons. I demanded a lawyer. The answer was "you're not gonna get one!" So I said I was hungry and that little guy whose life I saved on the swings? He held out his hands and in a very mean little voice said "here's some broccoli" so I put up a fit about the broccoli and asked for pizza - NO! for gum? NO!!! for ice cream? NO!!!!! Then I promised to never do it again. Broccoli Boy who was wearing a spiderman shirt claimed to have special x-ray vision that could detect a lie - after some cool sound effects and a stare down with intense soul searching, he proclaimed "It's a FAKE PROMISE!" so I had to bust myself outta there. I was chased down and rejailed. After a while, they decided they liked being chased more and one crafty kid snapped my cuffs and opened the door - the picnic table they had drug across the opening to prevent another escape. And seriously, they PAY me to do this stuff!! Well, not alot.... :)